As if it all matters...

You know what?? Yesterday - 2nd August 2009, I had a great time... tagging all friends on fb to Friendship Day wishes... and wishing those who were friends, close friends, best friends, aquintances and even whom I didnt wanna but I thought why nt...

But today... Today is different... It doesnt matter even if u wish or not.. you know why?? A really wise person once told me (actually the whole class) that we still dont have the status to be a friend.. and he was correct... when I am this tiny, what can anyone benefit outta me?? I dont have money, I dont go to bars, I am just a little tiny probably even ugly girl who is much more into books than gays...

And trust me this all is what matters...

You make a friend, no matter how nice you be... one day, they are gonna totally forget that even you are a human and can have certain problems and just because you were loud and they didnt bother to understand, they will fight with you, make you feel like dirt... look at you so badly that you feel why you existing... then they talk rude to you, but they are still good... they ask friends to take things from you and give them to use and you just say why cant u ask urself... and again they throw things at you BUT they are good!!

I am no gay... no alcoholic.. non smoker and no hook ups either.. probably thats why I am so outta the crowd.. and the best part is that people who dont do these either... make you feel angry so much that you forget that these are the people who really care for...

They will stand by you till you are in authority or lime light.. and then... they ditch you... they will give you 10000000000 bad qualities in the person you called best friend and now who is a bad girl but they turn into the same bad girl and say why are you stuck up with old things...
They wont understand that why are you so much in love with someone... they just know that all they have to do is make fun of that person without knowing him / her. I mean really is this friendship all about??

If a person is special to me.. all you do is - how can you even talk to him? and walk off... yea.. I give so much of a damn for such friends...

They wont talk to you for they are high enough.. they dont mind going corridoors away but if you are in the same corridor and even if they come to the room you are in... they are so busy that they dont even see you seeing them... longing for just a hi... but when you meet them in the corridoor and you dont say hi.. they will say 'She's got attitude'...

If this is attitude... yea I have it and lots of it..

and now.. I dont know if the meant people are reading it or nt... bt I want to tell this to someone and that someone is clever enough to know that this is for her... that SHUT UP!! YOu know what you talk really big about Pinky turning bad and stuff... well atleast, she doesnt say a hi to me when she is bored... When you call someone a friend, you dont need them when your other friends and not around and you are bored.. you say that I m nt talking to this girl or that.. and you critisize but the fact remains, whatever she is, she accepts it... what about you... you dont even accept your own self to others...

and then you say people ditched you?? Yea sure.. and what did you do? And foremost.. STOP speaking about any of the people that matter to me... You dont understand them for you are not meant to... So just let me be...

And finally... I hate to think that a person who says that you can call and we can still be friends, calls and says a job for my dad...

sometimes I wonder, such amazing friends I have... I dont know where it all went wrong.. but I so much wish it ends soon!! I am so fed up