Friday, January 29, 2010
Pps - I know Ps is supposed to be after the message.. but my blog.. my entry.. my way :P
Now.. for you girl.. listen (read) and listen (read) carefully.. I dont know what's wrong with you but I know things arent really amazing with me either and on top of everything I dont want you on my nerves...
See stop feeling possessive if that's what the problem is.. you know that no one and I mean NO ONE.. can take your place in my place.. today.. ever! Hogs is my FAMILY... my sisters and brothers... people to hold me from wrong.. to guide me... to tell me and to listen but they arent my besties.. you are! However there is just no comparison... Yes I remember all the words I am not allowed to use that a Hogs person told me.. but I also remember all the things u made me write... I dont do either...
Further... you need to accept it - I have changed! No I am not and I never will be the girl you met in 8th... the girl in 8th that entered your class on a Monday morning to an English Monday Test was lost in 8th itself... She never read... She never believed in anything but her God... I read... I deny to believe in the God who taught me to believe in everything but made himself unworthy of the belief (I think u know who I talk of)...
As of today... I had a farewell that no one can... and no one ever will.. a farewell with actually inviting Poojee to my wedding despite knowing how will I blind the guy I marry but my farewell was to the 2 people who were my life and in this school, I leave them behind... I realised I got clicked with alot of people.. but - NONE OF THEM MATTER!
I didnt get clicked with a single person who matters - Jyoti maam, Marwah maam, Sen maam, more importantly you or Adi...
Shiv.. try and please understand the place where I am... I have known trust in someone since I have known myself.. hell 12 - 13 years is a big deal.. today suddenly all those promises and all those words and everything seems fake.. no emotional song appeals.. I really am becoming that Kiran girl I told you about... and I guess its a matter of some months or years that I wont mind what she did for power...
I am becoming what I hate abt him... cant help it...
Amidst all this - no I didnt throw you outta my life.. I threw myself outta your life.. there is a difference.. you will matter the same much to me always but I just didnt want to make you realise it any more for I had grown tired of doing so all 11th and 12th.. actually just 11th...
You got a life and I totally appreciate it.. I dont want you sticking to me like a nanny for every problem I have.. I really appreciate when you are there but I wont ever force you no matter how much I want you.. and if I did mention there were times when I wanted you more than anyone.. someone who can listen and ask me to f*** the rest and carry on.. but I always knew that you got bigger and better things in hands and on mind... and its perfectly k...
All in all.. I wanna tell ya - NEVER COME BACK AGAIN if you wanna LEAVE... I can do it with you all leaving once but not over and over again... You will find me there whenever you need me (in some way or other) and I am just a message / call away.. but just try and understand what's on in me..
I didnt tell anyone a word for 2 big years... I did things without knowing why... I did things because they were so unlike myself.. I did things because I hated them.. and then suddenly you come and ask me to be verbal again.. tell you everything like before.. do what the Shruti you knew did..
This whole stuff in front of like the whole world is just there to let you know - If I were to count my besties.. I know I would count you first.. even before Shin (Shin dont kill me if you read this).. but its like I have a record of loosing everyone I hold dear - Eja, Nurav, Adi, Lihas (not exactly par name counts zyada karne ke liye what's the harm :P), Javed, Shivalika (my first bestie), frnds at Kuwait (who never know the real me till date), Kari and now you...
All I wanna say is - you matter - else there are really few people I talk to the world abt.. other ppl dont knw u.. either they have wrong conceptions about you or they heard me missing you... but you need to STOP thinking that I bitched or something because I have bitched abt Adi as well as Nurav but not abt u.. even when people I trusted told stuff...
Dont take it all wrong.. its just - Yes I miss you (sorry Mehran.. I hav almost forgotten old times so yes I can miss her) but I am just never gonna say it...
and if you really wanna do something for me.. Do good in your exams and do good in your life.. thats it!
And yes.. I know I shouldnt still I want to - thnks! For everything.. even telling me that a possibility is that Eja wont be happy forced back here...
Take Care and God Bless you.. :)
Monday, January 25, 2010
I entered this school on a Thursday morning... dressed in white shirt and blue jeans.. my dad wanted to shift from Rohini to central Delhi and he had applied in certain school here... DPS Mathura Road and Sardar Patel had replied.. my dad wanted me to go to DPS Mathura Road first..
I remember the first time I passed from the the 'Jhandewalan Temple' and from where the Metro is now running... Central Delhi was alien to me.. and today I can lead you to almost all places... My old school.. DPS Rohini was.. well again a DPS and really big.. but DPS Mathura Road was considered huge.. both area and achievement wise..
I entered the school with alot of positive attitude.. there is no arguing back about education to my parents.. they have to be right and so I do as told...
As I entered the gate.. and towards the reception.. I had no idea what next.. I had a written test and I was scared with that... I sat in the receptionist's room with 3 papers and my pen and sat doing my 'science, english and Mathematics (then Maths)'...
The copies went for correction immidiately and me and my dad were asked to wait.. the results came and we were supposed to meet the Principal who will tell the results and decide whether to give the admission or not... however.. it took a little longer and my dad was tired of waiting.. he had a meeting to reach and so he asked me to sit in the completely new place alone.. My dad told the PA to the principal then Mr. Rana that I was there alone and he will send the car back in 15 minutes to take me home... I dont know why my dad did this.. had he taken me with himself.. I wouldnt be in this school only...
Whatever.. I decided to do as asked and sat admiring the aquarium in the reception waiting area.. When I had initially entered the school main building, I saw the aquarium, the tropies outside Principal's room and the 2 big vases at the gate to the Principal's room... I had made a mental note to admire them later... while waiting I also saw a girl with her grandmother.. I had no idea why were they there.. but from then, I have seen the 2 at the same place so many times that I dont find it out of different now.. indeed I will, if it doesnt happen... wont mention the girl for I wouldnt want to hurt anyone (including myself :P)
However it was just a few mintues that I was alone and then a person from the Principal's room came and announced my name.. apparently the Principal wanted to meet me.. I told them my dad had gone but they said I was fine...
First time entering the Principal's room was like entering heaven from Earth.. I have to mention my Principal has a good taste... the room is completely wooden (I dont know about the floor for it is carpetted golden ever since).. the room has a yellowish glow and a warmth you wouldnt want to escape.. there is the Principal's huge wooden desk with his chair and computer and files and ofcourse the television screen showing the corridors.. on one side and on the other there is a very comfortable sofa with another aquarium... right in front are the trophies and pictures of the principal.. It made me shiver once.. I greeted the principal and took a seat when he asked me too.. he meant pure business.. and he told me that I scored best in math, then english and last science... I knew it and it was because I hadnt studied some things asked.. thats it.. he looked at the answer sheets.. to the screen with kids in corridor and told I am in and to collect my admission letter from Mr. Simon...
Yeapiee.. so I was here.. something struck me.. I wanted to go to Sardar Patel due to some personal reasons but this something wasnt enough to hide my happiness.. they say that its very difficult to get into a public school.. but here I was.. all alone and admission granted into one of the best schools of Delhi.. I told Mr. Rana what sir had said and he showed me the way to Mr. Simon... trust me.. I dont know about the corruption part but Mr. Rana has been really sweet to me.. and I donot fear declaring it - the new Paul guy suxx to the core..
Well I dont remember but it to be Mr. Rana.. he told I can join the school from this very day... and I told him.. I cant.. I am not in uniform... I dont have the books and further my dad will send for the car any moment.. I have to go home.. Meanwhile.. Mr. Simon told an age to ready the letter.. I told him I am in.. but he said that no I am not.. I tried to tell him that the Principal said so.. and he says no you are not.. I gave up arguing.. I knew I was in.. one guy couldnt just stand against the Principal..
I went home.. got snaps clicked for the admission processes.. and then I was in from Monday... my class 8 C (sorry if it was B but I remember it C) was totally crazy... I sat with Sofa (Sophia).. her bestie then was Akanksha who had a compartment and so wasnt attending school for sometime.. then I didnt even know what's a compartment but I didnt bother asking.. there was a Shruti in my class and this spread like news... I know one thing.. I remember everyone from my 8.. they may or maynot do so... but each of them is special.. they made 8 the most interesting section I could get into..
Thanks to - Karishma, Shivangi Raheja, Shivangi Goel, Ananya, Radhika, Sophia, Akanksha, Shruti, Shefali, Deeksha, Tarini, Shreya, Shweta, Aditi, Naila (who joined after me), Rishabh, Ankit, Akshat, Kunal, Akshar, Sagar, Akshays (there were 2 and I mean both), Amit (sorry), Abhinav, Rohan, Inderjit... I am sorry if I am missing on anyone... but I will remember all of you forever.. and yea - thanks for being there!
My 8 class memories are really sweet - remember going somewhere (I think DPS Noida) in a car from school and teasing Akshar about Radhika... the Christmas dance and asking Principal to let us do it on stage.. looking for the remix cassette.. Rishabh's all acts in the class.. Goel's getting Varun numerous popularity.. ASHA RANI SOOD!!... Rawat sir.. Sofa's getting best marks in hindi.. Poonam Gupta ma'am.. Adarsh maam, Deepti maam (the trainee math)... Mamta maam (trainee sst)...
and then 9th.. where the school gave me the most.. I got a bestie for life - Shivangi Raheja.. and the list is huge.. Adi (sorry Shiv... but someone takes away the credit from you.. but because of you Adi talked to me for the first time..), Marwah maam, Oracle classes, Kamini maam, Harpreet Maam, Pinku.. the computer gang - Naman bhaiyaa, Varun Bhaiyaa... and then other new students I had in my class - Juhi, Ashna, Zarah, Isha, Parul, Mehak, Sanchi, Kritika, Jona, Pooja... and yes how can I forget Vinni (the diva teacher), Anupama Khanna maam, mummy :P, Jyoti maam, Fatima maam... that organising assembly with Sudhakar sir and Lalit maam for the first time and coming to school so early.. all assemblies.. saying we can dance better.. the 'choti si asha' on Children's Day... the legendary PHOTOCOPY room :D LOL
The burning of Ravana and the other statues on Deepavali, the holi balloons, the crackers in the canteen.. the falling apples... getting pic clicked.. getting cell secretly...
the lady guards.. I remember once there were male guards and poor thing they never got anywhere near to know what we are upto.. but didis (lady guards) talk to us and are really sweet.. and this reminds me that I need their pic too :D
I will miss my labs.. the computer lab (I miss it already)... the bio slides (whatever 2 - 3 I made)... my physics and chem lab.. and most importantly the math lab which never got set up for we needed a new Vice Principal room :P... the lecture rooms.. MPH.. all the workshops... I met Dr. Nath in that MPH and so that MPH will be always the best hall I enter..
Then my topsy turby experience at the hostel.. attending Narayana classes at hostel.. never made me a hosteler but yes I got to be a suspecious day scholar.. so I was like balancing both boats.. but those classes made me meet some of the best men walking this Earth.. I am never gonna forget them - Anurag sir, Dash sir, Anoop sir, Pandey sir and Deepak sir... Because of them I had a great time at the centre and made some really good friends...
Most importantly.. Rehman maam and Rawat sir have been so sweet to me always.. that trust me it was a Princess Life that I lived under their shelter.. John sir, Happy maam have been great too.. the mess food.. trust me I love it.. I know you guys at hostel eat it daily but common its just like my mum cooks and still different so ofcourse I love it.. Then I am a little scared of Menrai maam and Anita maam.. but Menrai maam smiled at me at the farewell and I dont know why I felt like hugging her...
Honestly.. these are numerous and I will never complete writing them...
Then 11th was rocking too.. I know I wasnt a kind to suit my class but honestly guys you believe it or not I have stood with you all for long... and like always.. thanks for giving me 2 interesting years and a class that's always in highlights :D
I enjoyed every moment of it.. all fights.. I rediscovered myself in 11th.. came to face my fears and enforce my strengths.. ofcourse alot of people get credited for this.. specially Dr. U.S. Arora sir.. no I dont hate him.. but I dont know what was the story then... today I know he was a better choice than Adi.. unfortunately I dont have the time left to start knowing him.. but I hope aal remains well with him...
Then J.P. sir.. OMG.. he's even more forgetful than me and still so good with his work.. He is cute according to me ;) .. Mahua maam.. she's been the sweetest all along and even strict... she's taught us to be beautiful inside out.. She's one perfect person... pretty.. charming.. intelligent.. organised and she can talk to anyone with so easy.. I really envy her dresses :P
Naveen sir... trust me.. zindagi dobara dilchasp hui.. toh hum zaroor milenge... inshallah! He's been the most interesting person I have known for the past 2 years... he just pops into my life.. comments.. and goes.. even before I know he was here and then I have to spend hours to think 'what?'... he never leaves a chance to throw a question at me.. and thanks to him.. I have learnt some interesting answers.. :P
Sudha maam... fine.. I did hate that appointment affair and all.. but today when I see the whole picture.. she's been really sweet to me... and to all of us for that sake.. and whatever and whichever way she is.. I would want her to remain the same.. her smile fills the days with flowers.. a teacher that never stops smiling...
Tuli maam.. thanks for teaching me Economics.. trust me.. I am the worst choice to deal with money... and you taught me Economics for 2 years.. this is really calling for a huge award! :P
Okie.. I know I started off all over again.. but sorry... I think I will better write a small book with the whole story :P... all in all.. I am really proud of being an Indian... being a girl.. and from this moment onwards.. I am proud to be a part of DPS :D
Dont let me go into long.. but just I want to thank you if you were a part of DPS Mathura Road while I was here.. thanks a ton!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
tere cehhre ko taqte hain
kya inmein wohh noor hai
ya rab hai samaya
teri baatein mishri lage
tere har gham ko apnaya
in aankhoin mein hai kuch baat
ki inmein doobne ko dil toh chahe
par jab ye take
jism paani sa simat jaaye
voh alphaz jo tere labo se nikle
aur wohh jo hai aaj talak ankaha
ruk gayi poor kayanat
tham gaya sama
jab tere chehre par dikha
gham koi ghana
bahut yaadein hain jo aankhoin ko nam kar deti hain
saari baatein hai dil mein goonjti hui
ye doori na hone degi poori...
hamari kahaani adhoori reh gaye...
in aankhoin mein meri jannat basti hai...
inko kabhi nam mat rakhna
in labo se abhi bahut si baatein karni hai...
inhe kabhi hasi se door mat rakhna!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
and yea - Abhi itne bhi kaale nahi hain...
Ps : All fans (including me) this is jus some light hearted comedy.. no offense meant!
After Rancho suddenly disappears from ICE, Raju and Farhan Decide to call the world famous CID.
ACP: Ohh MY GODD !!! Rancho Gayab hai !! Abhijeet, Daya...campus ko acchi tarah se CHECK KARO !! Woh zaroor koi na koi suraag chhod gaya hoga !! (Shaking his finger)
(After searchin the campus like a pair of buffoons...Abhijeet and Daya find out that Joy had committed suicide 4 years back in the campus...)
Abhijeet: Sir, Mamla Gadbad hai...Yaha kisi joy naam ke student ne aatma-hatya ki thi 4 saal pehle. lagta hai woh aatma hatya nahi...khoon tha...aur shayad khooni yeh rancho hi hoga !!!
ACP: OHH MY GODD !!!
ACP: Yeh joy ki kabar khod ke uski laash bahar nikalo...aur use forensic lab me leke aao...dr. salunkhe zarur koi na koi baat ughalva denge iss murde aadmi se !!
(after fredricks does all the digging and brings out the dead body of joy...and the next scene is of the forensic lab)
Dr. Salunkhe: ACP, bahot jaldi laash laaye tum...isse kuch bulvana mushkil hoga...lekin tum tension mat lo...tum dr. salunkhe ke lab se khali haat nahi jaoge..koi na koi raaz toh pata chal hi jayega[
(after playin with some colour changing liquids)
Dr. Salunkhe : BOSS...tumne kaha isski maut suicide se hui hai...main kehta hu..iska khoon hua hai !!
ACP: Salunkhe !!! Mazaak ka waqt nahi hai !!...yeh kaise ho sakta hai??
Salunkhe: BOSS...sab kuch mumkin hai !! yeh dekho...(shows him his star-trek type computer and does some really fast typing)
ACP: OHH MY GODD !! (still shaking his finger)....toh phir yeh baat hamein kisi ne batayi kyu nahi ??...ek kaam karo...uss principal ko yahaan leke aao bureau me...ab kya sach hai..wahi hamein batayega !!
(virus is brought to the bureau)
Virus: Sssir, mujhe yahaan kyun bulaya hai...maine kuch nahi kiya
Abhijeet: sach sach batao...uss raat campus me kya hua tha???
virus: sssir, main sssach bol raha hu...mujhe kuch nahi pata hai??
(daya gives him his special CHAMAAAT !!!)
Daya: Ab yaad aaya kuch???
Virus: Haan Sir, sab yaad aa gaya...bata ta hu...sab bata ta hu !
Fredricks: (constipated look)..sir..daya sir ke chamaat me toh jaadu hai...iska 'sssss' kehna band ho gaya
ACP: Fredricks..chup raho !!
Virus: uss raat sab logo ne party ki thi....main bhi tha...lekin mere saath koi flirt hi nahi kar raha tha...isliye main bahot gusse me tha...phir Joy aaya aur usne mujhe uska helicopter dikhaya...maine uska helicopter gutter me fek diya..toh woh rote rote apne room me chale gaya. aur next din humne dekha toh uska murder ho gaya tha...lekin aap please yeh baat kisi se boliye mat...college ki badnaami ho jayegi...
ACP: hum kisi ko nahi batayenge...tum hamare saath co-operate karo
ACP: yahaan kuch toh gadbad hai daya....aisa kaise ho sakta hai ki campus me khoon ho gaya aur kisi ne CID ko bulaya hi nahin??
Abhijeet: sir shayad logo ko pata hai...ki pehle police ko bulana chaiye...CID ko nahi !!
ACP: Aur yeh kaise hua ki khooni campus me aa gaya..aur campus se khoon kar ke nikal gaya??
Vivek : Sir, shayad yeh bhi ho sakta hai ki khooni koi student hi ho?
ACP: haan vivek...kuch bhi ho sakta hai...kuch bhi (shaking finger)..ek kaam karo abhijeet...phir se campus me chalte hain...aur acchi tarah se check karte hain...yahaan daal me kuch kaala hai !!
Abhijeet: sir daal me kala nahi...puri daal mere jaisi kaali hi hai !!
(they reach the campus in their ol' faithful qualis which changes colour every episode...but the number plate is still the same...and daya slams the breaks....SCCHRREEEECH !!)]
ACP: Abhijeet, Vivek tum pura campus CHECK KARO....Daya tum iss campus ke saare DARWAAZE TOD DO !!....Fredricks...tum sab logo ko tumhare jokes se entertain karo...aur main yahaan baith ke apni ungli hilata hu....chalo sab apne apne kaam pe lag jaao !!
(after checking the campus)
Vivek: Sir, yahaan aiye....yeh dekho...yeh ek chatur naam ke ladke ki diary mili hai sir...isme likha hai ki woh rancho aur rancho ek dusre ke dushman the...aur woh rancho se badla lena chahta tha !!
ACP : (shaking finger...as usual)...OHH MY GODD !!! ab yeh Chatur kaun hai...aur iske room se itni baas kyun aa rahi hai !!...Good work vivek !!...iss evidence ko forensic lab le jao !
Abhijeet: Haain !!! Sir, dheere dheere sab pata chal raha hai...shayad se iss chatur ne hi joy ka khoon kiya hoga !! aur rancho kahaan gaya...usse hi pata hoga !!
ACP: Toh bulao iss Chatur ko Bureau mein...isse hi pooch ke dekhte hain !!
(chatur in interrogation)
ACP: Rancho kahaan hai ??
Chatur : I Don't Know Sir !! Mujhe nahi pata !!
Abhijeet: Dekho Sach Sach Batao !! Hamein yeh diary mili hai tumhare room se...isme saaf saaf likha hai ki tumhein rancho se jalan thi
Chatur : (over-acting)...mujhe nahi pata hai sir !! maine kuch nai kiya hai
(Daya gives ONE TIGHT SLAP and the chair spins)
Chatur: Haan haan...maine hi khoon kiya tha joy ka...kyonki usne mechanical helicopter banaya tha project me...aur maine sirf paper ka rocket banaya tha....boo hoo hoo !! Lekin phir woh kambakht Rancho aa gaya...usne mujhe dekh liya tha...isliye maine usko bhi gayab kar diya
ACP: waah...kya plan banaya tha...lekin afsos tum CID ke saamne kamiyaab nahi ho paaye...ab banate rehna plan...JAIL me...Tumhe toh FAASI hogi FAASI !!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
I saw Susie sitting in a shoe shine shop.
How many boards
from the comic Calvin & Hobbes, by Bill Waterson
How can a clam cram in a clean cream can?
Send toast to ten tense stout saints' ten tall tents.
by Raymond Weisling
Denise sees the fleece,
Coy knows pseudonoise codes.
by Pierre Abbat
Sheena leads, Sheila needs.
The thirty-three thieves thought that they thrilled the throne throughout Thursday.
Something in a thirty-acre thermal thicket of thorns and thistles thumped and thundered threatening the three-D thoughts of Matthew the thug - although, theatrically, it was only the thirteen-thousand thistles and thorns through the underneath of his thigh that the thirty year old thug thought of that morning.
by Meaghan Desbiens
Can you can a can as a canner can can a can?
Seth at Sainsbury's sells thick socks.
You cuss, I cuss, we all cuss, for asparagus!
from a Far Side cartoon by Gary Larson
Roberta ran rings around the Roman ruins.
Clean clams crammed in clean cans.
Six sick hicks nick six slick bricks with picks and sticks.
I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
There was a fisherman named Fisher
World Wide Web
To sit in solemn silence in a dull dark dock
by W.S. Gilbert of Gilbert and Sullivan from The Mikado
Picky people pick Peter Pan Peanut-Butter, 'tis the peanut-butter picky people pick.
from a commercial
If Stu chews shoes, should Stu choose the shoes he chews?
Luke's duck likes lakes. Luke Luck licks lakes. Luke's duck licks lakes. Duck takes licks in lakes Luke Luck likes. Luke Luck takes licks in lakes duck likes.
from Dr. Seuss' Fox in Socks
Seventy seven benevolent elephants
harder than it seems
There those thousand thinkers were thinking how did the other three thieves go through.
Santa's Short Suit Shrunk
name of a children's book
I was born on a pirate ship
Hold your tounge while saying it.
I scream, you scream, we all scream for icecream!
Wayne went to Wales to watch walruses.
In 'ertford, 'ereford and 'ampshire, 'urricanes 'ardly Hever 'appen.
from the film "My Fair Lady"
One-one was a race horse.
Eleven benevolent elephants
Celibate celebrant, celibate celebrant, celibate celebrant, ...
Willy's real rear wheel
David Bowser in Harrisburg, PA
If Pickford's packers packed a packet of crisps would the packet of crisps that Pickford's packers packed survive for two and a half years?
from Naomi Fletcher's real life
Six sleek swans swam swiftly southwards
Gobbling gorgoyles gobbled gobbling goblins.
Did Dick Pickens prick his pinkie pickling cheap cling peaches in an inch of Pinch or framing his famed French finch photos?
Pirates Private Property
What a terrible tongue twister,
When you write copy you have the right to copyright the copy you write. ...
A big black bug bit a big black dog on his big black nose!
by Kitty Morrow
Elizabeth's birthday is on the third Thursday of this month.
Ann and Andy's anniversary is in April.
Frogfeet, flippers, swimfins.
Hassock hassock, black spotted hassock. Black spot on a black back of a black spotted hassock.
How many cookies could a good cook cook If a good cook could cook cookies? A good cook could cook as much cookies as a good cook who could cook cookies.
How much ground would a groundhog hog, if a groundhog could hog ground? A groundhog would hog all the ground he could hog, if a groundhog could hog ground.
How much pot, could a pot roast roast, if a pot roast could roast pot.
How much wood could Chuck Woods' woodchuck chuck, if Chuck Woods' woodchuck could and would chuck wood? If Chuck Woods' woodchuck could and would chuck wood, how much wood could and would Chuck Woods' woodchuck chuck? Chuck Woods' woodchuck would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much wood as any woodchuck would, if a woodchuck could and would chuck wood.
Mary Mac's mother's making Mary Mac marry me.
from a song by Carbon Leaf
Mr. Tongue Twister tried to train his tongue to twist and turn, and twit an twat, to learn the letter "T".
Pete's pa pete poked to the pea patch to pick a peck of peas for the poor pink pig in the pine hole pig-pen.
She saw Sherif's shoes on the sofa. But was she so sure she saw Sherif's shoes on the sofa?
Through three cheese trees three free fleas flew.
from Fox in Sox by Dr. Seuss
Two tried and true tridents
rudder valve reversals
the cause of some plane crashes
Birdie birdie in the sky laid a turdie in my eye.
How many cans can a cannibal nibble
A twister of twists once twisted a twist;
Thirty-three thirsty, thundering thoroughbreds thumped Mr. Thurber on Thursday.
Four furious friends fought for the phone.
Plymouth sleuths thwart Luther's slithering.
Bobby Bippy bought a bat.
from mid-Willamette Valley theater
Black background, brown background.
Why do you cry, Willy?
Very well, very well, very well ...
Tie twine to three tree twigs.
Rory the warrior and Roger the worrier were reared wrongly in a rural brewery.
Mares eat oats and does eat oats,
Three short sword sheaths.
Caution: Wide Right Turns
seen on semi-tractor trailers
Rolling red wagons
Green glass globes glow greenly.
Robert Wayne Rutter
I stood sadly on the silver steps of Burgess's fish sauce shop, mimicking him hiccuping, and wildly welcoming him within.
When I was in Arkansas I saw a saw that could outsaw any other saw I ever saw, saw. If you've got a saw that can outsaw the saw I saw saw then I'd like to see your saw saw.
black back bat
The queen in green screamed.
How many berries could a bare berry carry,
What did you have for breakfast?
Snap Crackel pop,
Six slimy snails sailed silently.
I thought, I thought of thinking of thanking you.
Seven slick slimey snakes slowly sliding southward.
Red Buick, blue Buick
Roofs of mushrooms rarely mush too much.
by Matt Duchnowski
He threw three balls.
The great Greek grape growers grow great Greek grapes.
Singing Sammy sung songs on sinking sand.
We're real rear wheels.
Rhys watched Ross switch his Irish wristwatch for a Swiss wristwatch.
I wish to wash my Irish wristwatch.
Near an ear, a nearer ear, a nearly eerie ear.
On a lazy laser raiser lies a laser ray eraser.
Scissors sizzle, thistles sizzle.
Tom threw Tim three thumbtacks.
How much caramel can a canny canonball cram in a camel if a canny canonball can cram caramel in a camel?
He threw three free throws.
Fresh French fried fly fritters
Gig whip, gig whip, gig whip, ...
I was born on a pirate ship.
Say it while holding your tongue.
2 Y's U R.
Little Mike left his bike like Tike at Spike's.
Eddie edited it.
Yellow butter, purple jelly, red jam, black bread.
Wow, race winners really want red wine right away!
The ruddy widow really wants ripe watermelon and red roses when winter arrives.
I'll chew and chew until my jaws drop.
a strong drink
How many sheets could a sheet slitter slit if a sheet slitter could slit sheets?
Supposed to be pistachio,
by Diane Estep
Chester Cheetah chews a chunk of cheep cheddar cheese.
from a high school singing class
Real rock wall, real rock wall, real rock wall
If you're keen on stunning kites and cunning stunts,
Two tiny tigers take two taxis to town.
Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.
by Pierre Abbat
Willie's really weary.
Yally Bally had a jolly golliwog. Feeling folly, Yally Bally Bought his jolly golli' a dollie made of holly! The golli', feeling jolly, named the holly dollie, Polly. So Yally Bally's jolly golli's holly dollie Polly's also jolly!
by Mistah Twistah, Tony Valuch
Out in the pasture the nature watcher watches the catcher. While the catcher watches the pitcher who pitches the balls. Whether the temperature's up or whether the temperature's down, the nature watcher, the catcher and the pitcher are always around. The pitcher pitches, the catcher catches and the watcher watches. So whether the temperature's rises or whether the temperature falls the nature watcher just watches the catcher who's watching the pitcher who's watching the balls.
by Sharon Johnson
Tommy Tucker tried to tie Tammy's Turtles tie.
John, where Peter had had "had had", had had "had";
Excited executioner exercising his excising powers excessively.
Pail of ale aiding ailing Al's travails.
Double bubble gum, bubbles double.
If you can't can any candy can,
Octopus ocular optics.
by Pierre Abbat
This is the sixth zebra snoozing thoroughly.
Salty broccoli, salty broccoli, salty broccoli ....
I saw Esau kissing Kate.
A slimey snake slithered down the sandy sahara.
Suzie Seaword's fish-sauce shop sells unsifted thistles for thistle-sifters to sift.
I eat eel while you peel eel
Nothing is worth thousands of deaths.
Casual clothes are provisional for leisurely trips across Asia.
East Fife Four, Forfar Five
an actual football result from the Scottish third division
11 was a racehorse,
Wunwun was a racehorse, Tutu was one too. Wunwun won one race, Tutu won one too.
It's not the cough that carries you off,
She said she should sit.
Mo mi mo me send me a toe,
Will you, William? Will you, William? Will you, William?
I wish you were a fish in my dish
She stood on the balcony, inexplicably mimicking him hiccuping, and amicably welcoming him in.
an actor's vocal warmup for lips and tongue
The big black bug bit the big black bear,
Dust is a disk's worst enemy.
I see a sea down by the seashore.
Old Mr. Hunt
As one black bug, bled blue, black blood. The other black bug bled blue.
Mommy made me eat my M&Ms.
I'm not the fig plucker,
A gazillion gigantic grapes gushed
Aluminum, linoleum, molybdenum, aluminum, linoleum, molybdenum, aluminum, linoleum, molybdenum
Thin grippy thick slippery.
There once was a two toed, she toad, tree toad,
The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick
The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.
If you notice this notice,
If you understand, say "understand".
She sees cheese.
Brent Spence Bridge
places in Ohio
pertaining to the Siberian people living in Kamchatka
There those thousand thinkers were thinking
Five frantic frogs fled from fifty fierce fishes.
One smart fellow, he felt smart.
Seven sleazy shysters in sharkskin suits sold sheared sealskins to seasick sailors.
I would if I could! But I can't, so I won't!
But a harder thing still to do.
What a to do to die today
from a college drama class
Love's a feeling you feel when you feel
Silly sheep weep and sleep.
Truly rural, truly rural, truly rural, ...
A turbot's not a burbot, for a turbot's a butt, but a burbot's not.
I know a boy named Tate
I saw a saw in Arkansas,
The seething sea ceaseth; thus the seething sea sufficeth us.
Real weird rear wheels
by Michael Dworkin and Bill Harvey
I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit, upon a slitted sheet I sit.
A pessimistic pest exists amidst us.
Knife and a fork bottle and a cork
Chicken in the car and the car can go,
Five fuzzy French frogs Frolicked through the fields in France.
Two to two to Toulouse?
Dr. Johnson and Mr. Johnson, after great consideration, came to the conclusion that the Indian nation beyond the Indian Ocean is back in education because the chief occupation is cultivation.
Round and round the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran.
Buckets of bug blood, buckets of bug blood, buckets of bug blood
I'm a sock cutter and I cut socks.
If coloured caterpillars could change their colours constantly could they keep their coloured coat coloured properly?
We won, we won, we won, we won, ...
Thirty-three thousand people think that Thursday is their thirtieth birthday.
by Julia Dicum
How much ground could a grounghog grind if a groundhog could grind ground?
How may saws could a see-saw saw if a see-saw could saw saws?
by Jillian Goetz
As he gobbled the cakes on his plate,
from Dr. Seuss's O Say Can You Say?
How much myrtle would a wood turtle hurdle if a wood turtle could hurdle myrtle?
Shut up the shutters and sit in the shop.
Rattle your bottles in Rollocks' van.
A fly and flea flew into a flue,
How much dew does a dewdrop drop
If Kantie can tie a tie and untie a tie,
Bake big batches of bitter brown bread.
But she as far surpasseth Sycorax,
Caliban describing Miranda's beauty in "The Tempest", by William Shakespeare
Bake big batches of brown blueberry bread.
She sits in her slip and sips Schlitz.
Which wristwatch is a Swiss wristwatch?
Whoever slit the sheets is a good sheet slitter.
Mummies make money.
Crush grapes, grapes crush, crush grapes.
An elephant was asphyxiated in the asphalt.
A black bloke's back brake-block broke.
This is a zither.
Fresh fried fish,
There was a minimum of cinnamon in the aluminum pan.
Really leery, rarely Larry.
Big black bugs bleed blue black blood but baby black bugs bleed blue blood.
Elizabeth has eleven elves in her elm tree.
Her whole right hand really hurts.
difficult in Brazil
Tie a knot, tie a knot.
Red blood, green blood
I'm a sheet slitter.
Round the rugged rock, the ragged rascal ran.
Busy buzzing bumble bees.
A lump of red leather, a red leather lump
Nat the bat swat at Matt the gnat.
I shot the city sheriff.
A lady sees a pot-mender at work at his barrow in the street.
I am not a pheasant plucker,
Suzie, Suzie, working in a shoeshine shop.
Tommy, Tommy, toiling in a tailor's shop.
sung by Ian Mackintosh
Preshrunk silk shirts.
Craig Quinn's quick trip to Crabtree Creek.
Six shining cities, six shining cities, six shining cities.
While we were walking, we were watching window washers wash Washington's windows with warm washing water.
A big black bear sat on a big black bug.
A bloke's bike back brake block broke.
Sweet sagacious Sally Sanders said she sure saw seven segregated seaplanes sailing swiftly southward Saturday.
Betty Botter bought some butter but she said the butter's bitter. If I put it in my batter it will make my batter bitter. So, she bought some better butter, better than the bitter butter and she put it in her batter and her batter was not bitter. So 'twas good that Betty Botter bought some better butter.
How much oil boil can a gum boil boil if a gum boil can boil oil?
Good blood, bad blood, good blood, bad blood, good blood, bad blood.
No nose knows like a gnome's nose knows.
by the Hofman family
Freshly fried fresh flesh
There are two minutes difference from four to two to two to two, from two to two to two, too.
There once was a man who had a sister, his name was Mr. Fister. Mr. Fister's sister sold sea shells by the sea shore. Mr. Fister didn't sell sea shells, he sold silk sheets. Mr. Fister told his sister that he sold six silk sheets to six shieks. The sister of Mr. Fister said I sold six shells to six shieks too!
Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore. But if Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore then where are the sea shells Sally sells?
She stood by Burgess's fish sauce shop welcoming him in.
Swan swam over the sea.
Sally is a sheet slitter, she slits sheets.
She sells sea shells on the sea shore;
Tie twine to three tree twigs.
You know New York.
What noise annoys an oyster most?
Ripe white wheat reapers reap ripe white wheat right.
Blake's black bike's back brake bracket block broke.
Each Easter Eddie eats eighty Easter eggs.
She slits the sheet she sits on.
A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful ploughman strode through the streets of Scarborough; after falling into a slough, he coughed and hiccoughed.
A twister of twists once twisted a twist.
Red lolly, yellow lolly.
I am a mother pheasant plucker,
Mrs Hunt had a country cut front
John, where Molly had had "had", had had "had had". "Had had " had had the teachers approval
Miss Smith's fish-sauce shop seldom sells shellfish.
Great gray goats
Whether the weather be fine
Sunshine city, sunshine city, sunshine city, ...
The batter with the butter is the batter that is better!
There's a sandwich on the sand which was sent by a sane witch.
How many yaks could a yak pack pack if a yak pack could pack yaks?
Twelve twins twirled twelve twigs.
If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker
Clowns grow glowing crowns.
Can you imagine an imaginary menagerie manager
Sister Suzie sewing shirts for soldiers
Red leather, yellow leather, ...
IF IF = THEN THEN THEN = ELSE ELSE ELSE = IF;
programming language PL/I by Bruce Walker
Announcement at Victoria Station, London:
Richard's wretched ratchet wrench.
Rugged rubber baby buggy bumpers.
Betty Botter bought some butter but, said she, the butter's bitter.
A box of biscuits,
When a doctor doctors a doctor,
What to do to die today at a minute or two to two. A terribly difficult thing to say and a harder thing to do. A dragon will come and beat his drum Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-too at a minute or two to two today. At a minute or two to two.
Who is the author?
If two witches would watch two watches, which witch would watch which watch?
The soldier's shoulder surely hurts!
She sees seas slapping shores.
A loyal warrior will rarely worry why we rule.
by Ray Weisling
Mr. See owned a saw and Mr Soar owned a seesaw.
Six sick sea-serpents swam the seven seas.
There was a little witch which switched from Chichester to Ipswich.
A proper cup of coffee from a proper copper coffee pot.
Never trouble about trouble until trouble troubles you!
Theophilus Thadeus Thistledown, the succesful thistle-sifter, while sifting a sieve-full of unsifted thistles, thrust three thousand thistles through the thick of his thumb. Now, if Theophilus Thadeus Thistledown, the succesful thistle-sifter, thrust three thousand thistles through the thick of his thumb, see that thou, while sifting a sieve-full of unsifted thistles, thrust not three thousand thistles through the thick of thy thumb.
Shoe section, shoe section, shoe section, ...
A smart fella, a fella smart.
She is a thistle-sifter. She has a sieve of unsifted thistles and a sieve of sifted thistles and the sieve of unsifted thistles she sifts into the sieve of sifted thistles because she is a thistle-sifter.
Admidst the mists and coldest frosts,
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear,
Blue glue gun, green glue gun.
Betty bought some butter,
Toy boat, toy boat, toy boat, ...
Mallory's hourly salary.
I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit, and on that slitted sheet I sit.
Don't spring on the inner-spring this spring or there will be an offspring next spring.
A flea and a fly in a flue,
King Thistle stuck a thousand thistles in the thistle of his thumb.
Five fat friars frying flat fish.
The bottle of perfume that Willy sent
Esau Wood sawed wood. All the wood Esau Wood saw, Esau Wood would saw. All the wood Wood saw, Esau sought to saw. One day Esau Wood's wood-saw would saw no wood. So Esau Wood sought a new wood-saw. The new wood-saw would saw wood. Oh, the wood Esau Wood would saw. Esau sought a saw that would saw wood as no other wood-saw would saw. And Esau found a saw that would saw as no other wood-saw would saw. And Esau Wood sawed wood.
Betty bought some bitter butter
A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk,
I'm not the fig plucker,
Extinct insects' instincts, extant insects' instincts.
by Pierre Abbat
The sixth sheik's sixth sheep 's sick.
Sweater weather, leather weather.
One black beetle bled only black blood, the other black beetle bled blue.
The big black bug's blood ran blue.
I am not the pheasant plucker,
Ed Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott says he shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott, the shot was Shott, not Nott. However, the shot Shott shot shot not Shott - but Nott. So, Ed Nott was shot and that's hot! Is it not?
We will learn why her lowly lone, worn yarn loom will rarely earn immoral money.
by Ray Weisling
Unique New York, unique New York, unique New York, ...
If Dr. Seuss Were a Technical Writer.....
Here's an easy game to play.
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
You can't say this? What a shame, sir!
If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy on the disk,
from the Unix fortune database, attributed to DementDJ@ccip.perkin-elmer.com in the rec.humor.funny newsgroup
Picky people pick Peter Pan Peanut Butter.
Ray Rag ran across a rough road.
A Tudor who tooted the flute
Mrs Puggy Wuggy has a square cut punt.
Tim, the thin twin tinsmith.
Thin sticks, thick bricks
Red lorry, yellow lorry.
A big black bug bit a big black bear and made the big black bear bleed blood.
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck
Larry Hurley, a burly squirrel hurler, hurled a furry squirrel through a curly grill.
Six twin screwed steel steam cruisers.
A nurse anesthetist unearthed a nest.
I thought a thought.
She sells sea shells on the seashore.
From the programmer's desk:
A noise annoys an oyster, but a noisy noise annoys an oyster more!
Plain bun, plum bun, bun without plum.
There was a young man called Fisher
Slick slim slippers sliding south.
The Leith police dismisseth us
Ah shucks, six stick shifts stuck shut!
Meter maid Mary married manly Matthew Marcus Mayo,
The king would sing, about a ring that would go ding.
How much dough would Bob Dole dole
People pledging plenty of pennies.
Mares eat oats and does eat oats, but little lambs eat ivy.
from a pre-war English music-hall song
To begin to toboggan first, buy a toboggan.
Switch watch, wrist watch.
Six thick thistle sticks.
Black bug's blood
Moses supposes his toeses are roses,
Donald O'Connor and Gene Kelly in "Singing in the rain
I wish I were what I was when I wished I were what I am.
She sells seashells on the seashore. The seashells she sells are seashore seashells.
She had shoulder surgery.
To put a pipe in byte mode, type PIPE_TYPE_BYTE.
from the Visual C++ help file.
Three Tree Turtles
Three tree turtles took turns talking tongue twisters.
My Friend Gladys
Oh, the sadness of her sadness when she's sad.
I would if I could, and if I couldn't, how could I?
common school kids nonsense, circa 1910
real rear wheel
Give me the gift of a grip-top sock,
articulation warmup for actors
National Sheepshire Sheep Association
The crow flew over the river with a lump of raw liver.
The little red lorry went down Limuru road.
Limuru (Lee-moo-roo) road is a the name of a road in Kenya.
Flies fly but a fly flies.
Did Doug dig Dick's garden or did Dick dig Doug's garden?
by Paul Davies
If a Hottentot taught a Hottentot tot to talk ere the tot could totter, ought the Hottentot tot be taught to say ought or naught or what ought to be taught 'er?
How many cans can a canner can if a canner can can cans? A canner can can as many cans as a canner can if a canner can can cans.
Federal Express is now called FedEx.
Which witch snitched the stitched switch for which the Swiss witch wished?
by Ann Clark
Does this shop sport short socks with spots?
Customer: Do you have soothers?
actual conversation in a shop in Canada, recorded by Don Monson
Tommy, Tommy, toiling in a tailor's shop.
No need to light a night light on a light night like tonight.
I wish to wish, I dream to dream, I try to try, and I live to live, and I'd die to die, and I cry to cry but I dont know why.
from a Song by Soundgarden named "Somewhere" composed and written by Ben Shepherd
My mommy makes me muffins on Mondays.
by Tim McCauley, age 8
A real rare whale.
Terry Teeter, a teeter-totter teacher, taught her daughter Tara to teeter-totter, but Tara Teeter didn't teeter-totter as Terry Teeter taught her to.
by Pierre Abbat
Ken Dodd's dad's dog 's dead.
I bought a bit of baking powder and baked a batch of biscuits. I brought a big basket of biscuits back to the bakery and baked a basket of big biscuits. Then I took the big basket of biscuits and the basket of big biscuits and mixed the big biscuits with the basket of biscuits that was next to the big basket and put a bunch of biscuits from the basket into a biscuit mixer and brought the basket of biscuits and the box of mixed biscuits and the biscuit mixer to the bakery and opened a tin of sardines.
Said to be a diction test for would-be radio announcers: To be read clearly, without mistakes, in less than 20 seconds (from Coronet Magazine, August 1948).
Kanta is a masai girl, she can tie a tie and untie a tie, if kanta can tie a tie and untie a tie, why can't I tie a tie and untie a tie?
I'm a mother pheasant plucker.
If you go for a gopher a gopher will go for a gopher hole.
Seven slick and sexy sealskin ski suits slid slowly down the slope.
The chief of the Leith police dismisseth us.
Fred Threlfall's thirty-five fine threads are finer threads than Fred Threlfall's thirty-five thick threads.
by Anthony Nichols
Bug's black blood
Reed Wade Road
Jack's nap sack strap snapped.
I saw Esau sitting on a seesaw. I saw Esau; he saw me.
A quick witted cricket critic.
Hitchcock Hawk Watch Spots Record Raptors
Title of an article in the Neola Gazette
Sure, sir, the ship's sure shipshape, sir.
The Smothers brothers' father's mother's brothers are
One Double Dozen Double Damask Dinner Napkins
Name of a sketch written by Dion Titheradge for a London musical revue and originally performed by Cicely Courtneidge in the early 1930's. The comedienne Bea Lillie performed the sketch in an American film starring Bing Crosby in 1938, and that film's name was "Doctor Rhythm". The sketch became famous and Lillie did perform it on numerous occasions on radio, as well as record it on two 78rpm records.
The cat crept into the crypt, crapped and crept out.
Blended baby blue bug's blood blotches.
made up watching bugs splatter on the windshield ... ugh!
So, this is the sushi chef?
Spoken to a friend in a Japanese restaurant on the chef’s return.
Betty Botter bought some butter, but the butter Betty Botter bought was bitter. So Betty Botter bought some better butter to make the bitter butter Betty Botter bought better. But instead of the better butter Betty Botter bought making the bitter butter Betty Botter bought better, the bitter butter Betty Botter bought made the better butter Betty Botter bought bitter!
Furnish Freddie's nursery with forty-four furry Furby Beanie Babies.
Arnold Palmer, Arnold Palmer, Arnold Palmer, ...
name of the famous American golfer
A bitter biting bittern bit a better biting bittern
Certified certificates from certified certificate certifiers.
Imagine, imagining imagining, an imaginary imaginary imaginary menagerie manager, imagining imagining imagining an imaginary imaginary imaginary managerie.
What noise annoys a noisy oyster?
We need a plan to fan a pan; find a pan to fan, then find a fan to fan the pan, then fan the pan.
Some Korean students find difficult to pronounce difference between 'f' and 'p'.
thnks to - http://www.uebersetzung.at/twister/en.htm
Recently reading a lot of emails (because that is what I do), I realized that there is no correct or incorrect way to perform written com...
Updated May 27, 2017: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------...
Scene 1 We are in a water park where all water swings are there and stuff... people have come here for picnic and they are enjoying rides...